I TOLD YOU, YOU (BLANKITY BLANK) I HAD A HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL IN MY BILLFOLD I'D GIVE YOU IF YOU WOULD JUST TAKE US TO SHORE. NOW HERE IT IS. I TOLD HIM I DON'T WANT YOUR MONEY AND TURNED AROUND AND WALKED OFF. BY THE TIME I GOT TO THE CABIN I COULD STILL HEAR HIM CUSSING.

MY FRIEND PAT AND HIS FRIEND DALE AND I HAD JUST PULLED A BOAT TO SHORE AT TUCKER'S CAMP ON CADDO LAKE. PAT AND HIS FRIEND DALE HAD DRIVEN DOWN TO CADDO TO FISH WITH ME ONE SATURDAY AND SUNDAY. THEY HAD ARRIVED ABOUT NOON SATURDAY BUT THUNDER STORMS HAD KEPT US OFF THE LAKE UNTIL ABOUT AN HOUR BEFORE DARK. MY BUDDY FROM DENVER WAS COOKING SUPPER WHILE THE THREE OF US WENT TO BAIT SOME LIMB LINES WITH WEENIES. BUT THAT'S A WHOLE NOTHER STORY FOR A DIFFERENT TIME.

AS WE APPROACHED LITTLE GREEN BREAKS WE SAW THIS BOAT WITH THREE PEOPLE IN IT WAVING TO US. I PULLED UP CLOSE TO THEIR BOAT TO SEE WHAT WAS WRONG. THEY TOLD US THE THUNDER STORM THAT HAD JUST PASSED HAD CAUGHT THEM OUT IN THE OPEN AND HAD TURNED THEIR BOAT OVER. THEY MANAGED TO GET THE BOAT TURNED UPRIGHT AND CLIMB BACK IN BUT THEY HAD LOST MOST OF THEIR GEAR. THEIR MOTOR WOULDN'T START BECAUSE IT WAS WET. THEY WERE WET AND COLD AND ABOUT 1/2 MILE FROM SHORE. THEY WANTED TO KNOW IF WE WOULD PULL THEM IN. SURE WE TOLD THEM. WE WOULD NEVER LEAVE ANYONE STRANDED OUT IN THE LAKE. BUT BEFORE WE DID WE WANT TO GO ABOUT 300 YARDS DOWN HERE AND BAIT 24 LIMB LINES. THESE BOYS HAVE DRIVEN OVER 200 MILES FOR ONE NIGHT'S FISHING I SAID. WE CAN BAIT THE LINES IN 20 MINUTES AND WILL COME BACK AND PULL YOU IN.

THE MAN IN THE FRONT OF THE BOAT STARTED CUSSING. HE SAID HE WAS WET AND COLD AND HE WANTED TO GO RIGHT NOW! HE DIDN'T GIVE A BLANKITY BLANK ABOUT HOW FAR THOSE BLANKITY BLANKS HAD DRIVEN! HE HAD A WET HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL IN HIS BILLFOLD HE WOULD GIVE ME TO TAKE HIM TO SHORE RIGHT THEN. I IGNORED HIM AND TOLD THE MAN IN THE BACK OF THE BOAT TO PADDLE OVER TO SOME LITTLE CYPRUS TREES ABOUT 20 YARDS AWAY. THAT WAY THEY WOULD BE OUT OF SOME OF THE WIND AND BE PROTECTED FROM THE WAVES. WE WOULD BE BACK TO GET THEM IN 20 MINUTES. I NOTICED THERE SEEMED TO BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE MAN IN THE MIDDLE. HE WAS JUST SITTING THERE STARING STRAIGHT AHEAD. HE NEVER SAID A WORD.

WE WENT TO MY LIMB LINES, BAITED THEM, AND WAS BACK TO GET THE STRANDED BOAT IN ABOUT 20 MINUTES. BUT WE COULDN'T FIND THEM. THEY WEREN'T WHERE THEY WERE SUPPOSE TO BE. PAT SAID, “MAYBE THEY DECIDED TO TRY TO PADDLE IN.” “I HOPE NOT PAT, THOSE WAVES ARE STILL TO HIGH FOR THAT LITTLE BOAT.” BY THAT TIME IT WAS GETTING DARK. IT WAS HARD TO SEE ANYTHING.

WE STARTED SLOWLY TOWARD SHORE. IT WASN'T LONG BEFORE WE FOUND THE MISSING BOAT. THEY HAD ONLY GOTTEN A LITTLE WAYS IN THE WIND AND WAVES. THE IDIOT IN THE FRONT OF THE BOAT WAS PADDLING AND THE MAN IN THE BACK WAS BAILING WATER. THE ONE IN THE MIDDLE WAS STILL SITTING THERE STARING STRAIGHT AHEAD. WHEN WE PULLED UP NEXT TO THEM I ASKED WHY THEY DIDN'T WAIT FOR US. ALL THE IDIOT COULD DO WAS CUSS. I ASKED THE MAN IN THE BACK OF THE BOAT IF THE IDIOT WAS DRUNK OR JUST PLAIN CRAZY. HE SAID HE DIDN'T KNOW. HE DIDN'T KNOW HIM AT ALL. HIS FISHING BUDDY (YOU KNOW THE ONE IN THE MIDDLE THAT WAS IN THE CATATONIC STUPOR) HAD INVITED HIM. THIS WAS THE FIRST TIME HE HAD EVER LAID EYES ON HIM. THIS WAS HIS BOAT AND HE WAS JUST TRYING TO KEEP IT FROM SINKING.

I TOLD THE CUSSING IDIOT TO THROW US THE ROPE THAT WAS TIED TO THE FRONT OF THEIR BOAT. HE SAID, “NO! I DON'T WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH YOU!” ONLY HE SALTED IT UP WITH A FEW WORDS NEVER HEARD IN SUNDAY SCHOOL. I TOLD THE OWNER OF THE BOAT TO STEP OVER INTO MY BOAT AND HE AND PAT COULD HOLD HIS BOAT AGAINST THE SIDE OF MINE. HIS BOAT WAS OVERLOADED WITH THE THREE OF THEM IN IT ANYWAY.

WELL WE MANAGED TO GET BACK TO CAMP AFTER A LONG AND HARD RIDE FOR ALL OF US. WHEN WE GOT BACK TO SHORE JUST AS SOON AS THEIR BOAT TOUCHED THE BANK THE GUY CAME OUT OF HIS STUPOR. HE HIT THE BANK RUNNING. WE HAVEN'T SEEN HIM SINCE. THE GUY THAT OWNED THE BOAT SHOOK MY HAND AND SAID THANK YOU. WHEN I FINISHED. TYING MY BOAT TO THE POST I TURNED AROUND AND THERE WAS THE THIRD GUY. “HERE'S YOUR (BLANKITY BLANK) HUNDRED DOLLAR BILL.” HE SAID. “I DON'T WANT YOUR MONEY” I SAID, AS I TURNED AND WALKED OFF.

PAT SAID HE CUSSED ME FOR AS LONG AS HE COULD SEE ME. LATER PAT ASKED ME IF I WOULD PULL HIM IN IF I EVER FOUND HIM STRANDED AGAIN. I SAID IT'S SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT ISN'T IT?