MISS EMPIRE  

MISS EMPIRE WAS A PARTY GIRL. THAT'S ALL THERE WAS TO IT. SHE DIDN'T GO FISHING. SHE DIDN'T GO TO WORK. WHEN SHE WENT OUT SHE WENT OUT TO PARTY. SHE WAS DOLLED UP BETTER THEN ANYONE AROUND HER. HER SKIRT WAS GREEN AND HER TOP WAS BRIGHT YELLOW. MISS EMPIRE WAS ABOUT 20 FEET LONG, 8 FEET WIDE, AND HAD A CHRYSLER CAR ENGINE IN HER. WHAT? YOU THOUGHT I WAS TALKING ABOUT A GIRL. NO! NO! MISS EMPIRE WAS A BOAT, AND WHAT A BOAT, A PARTY BOAT.

MY DAD AND A COUPLE OF HIS BUDDIES ART DEAN AND WILBER SPEAKER BUILT HER OUT OF TANK STEEL. THEY WORKED FOR CITIES SERVICE PIPE LINE COMPANY AT GLADEWATER, TEXAS. CITIES SERVICE WAS FORMALLY KNOWN AS THE EMPIRE OIL COMPANY. DURING THEIR SPARE TIME THEY HAD MADE THE MISS EMPIRE IN THE COMPANY'S WELDING SHOP. SHE HAD A METAL AWNING OVER THE BACK 3/4 OF THE BOAT FOR SHADE. SHE HAD SEATS DOWN EACH SIDE. SHE HAD A BIG SPOT LIGHT ON TOP OF THE AWNING AT THE FRONT FOR NIGHT RUNNING. THEY KEPT HER AT JOHNSON'S RANCH ON CADDO LAKE. SHE WAS THE PRETTIEST BOAT THERE.

MOTHER AND DAD, ART AND VIRGINIA DEAN AND MR. SPEAKER AND HIS WIFE WOULD GO TO CADDO WHEN THEY GOT OFF WORK ON SATURDAY AFTERNOON AND SPEND HOURS CRUISING AROUND THE LAKE. THEY HAD A CAR RADIO IN THE BOAT AND THEY WOULD TUNE IN THE OLD “LOUISIANA HAY RIDE” OUT OF SHREVEPORT FOR MUSIC AND HAD ROOM TO DANCE. MISS EMPIRE WAS A REAL PARTY GIRL.

I CAN REMEMBER DAD TALKING ABOUT ONE TIME WHEN UNCLE EARL WAS VISITING FROM ILLINOIS, TAKING A RIDE IN THE MISS EMPIRE. UNCLE EARL HAD BROUGHT AUNT IRENE, DAD'S SISTER, AND HER SON, DUTCH, WITH HIM. WE ALL WENT TO THE LAKE ONE SATURDAY AFTERNOON FOR A BOAT RIDE. DAD DECIDED TO TAKE THE KIN FOLK ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE DAM. ABOUT A SEVEN MILE RUN FROM JOHNSON'S RANCH.

WELL WE WERE CRUISING ALONG LISTENING TO COUNTRY AND WESTERN MUSIC ON THE LOUISIANA HAY RIDE OUT OF SHREVEPORT AND ENJOYING THE LAKE. BACK IN THOSE DAYS THERE WAS VERY LITTLE BOAT TRAFFIC ON THE LAKE. WHEN WE GOT DOWN TO MOORINGSPORT, LOUISIANA DAD DECIDED WE BETTER NOT GO ON TO THE DAM BECAUSE IT WAS GETTING DARK. HE DECIDED IT WAS TIME TO TURN BACK.

IN THOSE DAYS THE ONLY MARKINGS ON THE LAKE WERE THE OLD RIVER CHANNEL PILINGS THAT THE STEAM BOATS HAD USED TO FOLLOW THE RIVER CHANNEL UP TO JEFFERSON. THE RIVER CHANNEL WOUND BACK AND FORTH LIKE A SNAKE AND TO FOLLOW IT WOULD MAKE THE JOURNEY TWICE AS LONG. BUT TO STRIKE OUT ON YOUR OWN THROUGH THE CYPRESS TREES AND STUMPS AFTER DARK COULD BE DANGEROUS.

WHEN WE STARTED BACK DAD GOT OVER INTO THE OLD RIVER CHANNEL AND WAS PICKING OUT THE CHANNEL MARKERS WITH THE SPOT LIGHT. IT WAS GOING TO TAKE FOREVER TO GET BACK LIKE THIS. ABOUT HALF WAY BACK. WE WERE JUST PASSING SWANSON'S LANDING WHEN HE GOT IMPATIENT AND SAID TO HECK WITH THIS AND HE LEFT THE RIVER CHANNEL AND STRUCK OUT ON HIS OWN.

HE SAID HE PICKED OUT THE NORTH STAR AND HEADED FOR IT. RIGHT OUT INTO THE CYPRESS TREES AND STUMPS. HE SAID IT LOOKED LIKE THOSE TREES WOULD OPEN UP AND LET THE BOAT GO THROUGH AND THEN CLOSE BACK UP BEHIND US. IN JUST A LITTLE WHILE WE HIT THE CHANNEL AGAIN AND WE WERE ONLY A FEW HUNDRED YARDS BELOW JOHNSON'S. THAT WAS SOME BOAT RIDE.

I REMEMBER ONE TIME WHEN WE WERE GOING FOR A BOAT RIDE IN THE MISS EMPIRE WITH TWO OTHER FAMILIES. WE WERE GOING OUT ON THE LAKE LATE ONE EVENING TO BOAT RIDE AND HAVE A PICNIC. THERE WAS AN OLD BLACK MAN THAT WORKED AS A FISHING GUIDE OUT OF JOHNSON'S RANCH. HE WAS CALLED "RED." I DON'T KNOW WAY BECAUSE HIS HAIR SURE WASN'T RED. BUT ANYWAY DAD WAS GOING TO HIRE HIM TO RUN THE BOAT.

"RED" ASKED DAD HOW LONG WE WOULD BE OUT. DAD TOLD HIM HE DIDN'T KNOW, PROBABLY THREE OR FOUR HOURS. “THAT WILL MEAN YOU WILL BE OUT THERE AFTER DARK DON'T IT,” RED ASKED?  DAD TOLD HIM, “WELL YES, BUT WE'VE GOT THAT BIG SPOT LIGHT FOR NIGHT RUNNING. BESIDES WE WILL JUST STAY IN THE CHANNEL HERE CLOSE. THERE'S NO WAY YOU CAN GET LOST.” RED SAID, “I'M NOT FEARED OF GETTEN LOST. IT'S THEM MONSTERS THAT COME OUT AFTER DARK OUT THERE ON THE LAKE WHAT'S I'M FEARED OF. NO SIR MR. CHARLIE YOU FIND YOU SOME ONE ELSE. CAUSE I AIN'T GOING!” NO AMOUNT OF MONEY OR PERSUASION COULD MAKE HIM CHANGE HIS MIND.

NOW YOU GO AHEAD AND LAUGH AT THE IDEA THAT THERE ARE MONSTERS IN CADDO LAKE AFTER DARK. BUT I'VE BEEN OUT ON THE LAKE HUNDREDS OF TIMES AFTER DARK AND I'M HERE TO TELL YOU I'M A BELIEVER IN MONSTERS IN CADDO LAKE.  BUT THAT'S A WHOLE NOTHER STORY FOR A DIFFERENT TIME.  IF YOU WERE OUT THERE AFTER DARK AND HEARD ALL THE WEIRD SOUNDS AND BIG SPLASHES YOU WOULD BE A BELIEVER ALSO,

WELL AS TIME WENT BY MISS EMPIRE WAS USED LESS AND LESS. SHE FINALLY FELL INT0 DISREPAIR AND BEGAN TO LEAK. JOHNSON PULLED HER ACROSS THE CHANNEL AND TIED HER TO A CYPRESS TREE. HE DIDN'T WANT HER TO SINK IN ONE OF HIS BOAT STALLS. .SHE FINALLY TOOK ON ENOUGH WATER THAT SHE SANK TIED TO THAT TREE.

EVEN AS LATE AS THE EARLY 70's WHEN THE LAKE WOULD BE WAY DOWN LOW, LONG ABOUT AUGUST YOU COULD STILL SEE THE REMAINS OF THE ONCE PROUD PARTY BOAT SITTING THERE ON THE BOTTOM. IF IT HAPPENED TO BE A SATURDAY NIGHT, AND IF YOU LISTENED REAL CLOSE YOU MIGHT STILL HEAR HANK WILLIAMS SINGING “ HONKY TONK ANGEL" ON THE OLD “LOUISIANA HAY RIDE.”